A British woman has married Osama bin Laden’s son.

The Sun reports that Jane Felix-Browne, 51, a mum of three and grandmother from Cheshire met Omar bin Laden, 26, during a horseback tour of the Pyramids last September and got married in April in Egypt.

Jane tells the paper: ‘He is the most beautiful person I have ever met. His heart is pure, he is pious, quiet – a true gentleman. And he is my best friend.’

Omar’s other wife may say the same thing, of course. He currently lives with her and their child in Jeddah but Jane says she and Omar ‘spend up to 15 hours a day talking on the phone or over the internet’.

Omar, a scrap metal merchant is, apparently the perfect husband except for one thing. Can you guess what that is?

 

Yes indeed. Which is why Jane is remaining a Felix-Browne. ‘I won’t be using it myself,’ said Jane of the surname. ‘… he finds it very difficult to travel anywhere. He rarely leaves Saudi Arabia because of the problems he runs into at airports.’

Jane. Your ‘No Sh*t, Sherlock’ award is in the post.

Actually, Jane only narrowly beat the Daily Mail to the prize. Their front page concerns the problems faced by first time buyer. You’ll never guess what they are.

Give up? Well, the main ones are property prices are ridiculously high and people don’t really earn enough to afford them.

Shocking huh? Bet you never saw that coming.

Meanwhile at the Big Brother house… things happened, other things happened as a result, Charley the transvestite (come on, ‘she’ must be) shouted at someone… Is anyone actually still watching it this year?

Aside from the three people who posted messages speculating that Ziggy, who was in a band in the late 90s, must have known fake housemate Thaila / Pauline. Who was in another band in the late 90s.

Or maybe they don’t. Does anyone really care?

Finally some good news from the Mirror. Provided you’re a smoker in Stoke-on-Trent.

The City Council, run by an electoral mayoral system, needs to formally adopt the anti-smoking legislation before they can enforce it. And they forgot.

Smokers thus have until early August to puff away in public. Fancy a day trip?

By: Neil Davey, 11.07.07